Before I came to camp, I got a letter in the mail from my friend Gregory. In it, he wrote about how in the Gospel of Luke, people wanted huge signs from Jesus but Jesus kept saying that the way to the Kingdom was from small acts of service and a heart pursuing the Lord.
It stuck with me a lot and after spending a lot of time considering the ease of grand acts of service done quietly (recognition usually follows big service) I decided to make it my mission to spend the summer being quiet and small in what I do.
Campers came on Monday. We had way too many campers and not enough staff, and so I began a dual role as a counselor and the craft house director. God has been answering my prayers, even the ones I’ve only felt and not translated into words, and the girls in my cabin are SO AMAZING that I have nothing to complain about. Basically I am walking around, followed by nine 10-year-old girls who think I am the coolest, and facilitating crafts.
Don’t be fooled, though. It is a lot harder and draining that it seems. Today one of the girls didn’t see my coffee on the step of her bunk and spilled it all over the floor, and a few minutes later I cried about it. As I write this, every ounce of my body wants to shut off, but I feel this strange sense of adrenaline.
I love the verse in 2 Corinthians 12:9 where it talks about God’s strength being made perfect in my weakness. Usually I am afraid of getting weak, of feeling tired, of being worn down.. but the reality is that I must allow and accept that I will reach this point if I am to ever really, truly, and completely be carried through by the strength of the Lord.
God preemptively gave me strength by giving me the best cabin in the entire world. God continues to give me strength by affirming my decision to remain quiet about the frustration and exhaustion of this week.. through encouragement and smiles and hugs and campers and visitors..
“He’s gonna carry me when I get weary.”
The sun is out, finally. I am going to wander around, feel the sun on my skin, breathe in deeply, walk with Jesus, and pray. Rest.
For the campers.
For the staff.
For the gospel to be preached.
And above all,
His self control.